I tried to enroll on a website recently, but they didn’t allow me to continue without choosing five security questions out of about ten samples they supplied. I started in good faith to do what they asked.
Question: What is your father’s middle name?
Answer: They do not have middle names in Russia; they have something called “otchestvo” and I know seven different ways to spell my father’s.
Question: What is the name of the street on which you were born?
Answer: I am glad it was not Lenin Street, but it was equally bad. Besides, it was renamed and I am not sure which name to choose.
Question: What is the name of your high school?
Answer: Finally, an easy question. In Russia we didn’t have names, but rather numbers for schools. I happily entered 444, and oops — the applet wouldn’t accept numbers.
I couldn’t find five questions that I could answer uniquely and reliably. I felt that the designers of these questions were clueless and disrespectful to other cultures. Then I thought about whether I really wanted some creepy database to know the name of my best friend. No, I didn’t.
Now I have established a file where I put the answers to security questions and I can have all the fun I want with my new biography. I can name my first dog Tom Cruise and have my wedding date be 20 years before I was born. I can name my husband Freedom Of Speech and my city of birth IHateSecurityQuestions. Maybe next time I will switch: Freedom Of Speech will be my dog and Tom Cruise my husband.
If you are lazy like me, you can choose your questions so you have the same answer for everything. This way you do not need to type much into your file. For example, you can name your city, your cat and your best friend George Washington. Or, if you are really lazy, God.Share: